Blog ArchiveJessica Alba—Still Sexy?She can't act worth poo (See Fantastic Four) and may And just who is Cash Warren anyway? Jessica Alba fans hate him, that's for sure.Probably because they can't really dig up any info on him. Probably because he is an absolute nobody--a personal assistant peon in the Entertainment industry who must've done something clever in a past life to land a hot Hollywood starlet who can't act and does other things bad too. Except for wearing a bikini. She's very very good at that. Celebrity Sex Tapes1 Night in Paris...gag us. Pamela Anderson & Tommy Lee's Tape...at least he's hung. Then you've got the tapes that have been released but you'd rather stick a vibrator down your throat than see, like Tonya Harding's sex tape with husband Jeff Gillooly. It's no secret that celebrities love themselves, but it's even less of a secret that we love to watch them do it! But don't go thinking that you'll end up the next internet superstar if you stick a camera in your bedroom. Even if you're hot, nobody wants to see ordinary people having sex. Plus, only already famous people can make a sex tape and become even hotter for it. In real life, you'll loose your family, you'll probably loose your partner, and you'll loose your job, your friends, and any ounce of self-dignity you once had. Come on, who really wants to see "1 Night in Howard"? Kim Kardashian Gets Mind GropedSo we can't blame these guys for ogling. Or maybe they were just trying to get their pupils to work right after the lunar exclipse. We kid, we kid. It's nice to see a dumb celebrity with a real woman's body--a body built for Playboy. Speaking of which, have you seen her Playboy photos? They are mighty hot. And they reveal everything--she's completely nude. We're talking commando. Boobs and ass and other girlie parts everywhere. Don't most Hollywood stars who pose for Playboy make some kind of deal that they will take tasteful photos? Like photos that leave something to the imagination? Sheesh. One of her boobs is as big as our HP desktop.  Celebrity Mug Shots—Hot or Not?Kumari Fulbright, Nick Nolte, and James Brown didn’t fare so well. C’mon guys, if the ladies can do it with class, why can’t you? It’s interesting to note that some of the best mug shots came from DUIs, while the worst were from kidnapping and domestic violence cases. So drink yourselves into pretty mug shots, Hollywood! Just for fun, let's take a look at the top 10 Celebrity DUI arrests for 2007. Yes, there were that many! (And Paris Hilton and Nichole Richie aren't on it--they did the no, no, bad thing in 2006.)
Geez. It looks like a DUI arrest is becoming a prerequisite to make it in Hollywood. Woe to those of us peons that must drive on the same roads as the exhaulted. What do Timbaland, a Pussycat Doll, and Ski Masks have in common?Why pay all of that money to have Pussycat Doll Nichole Scherzinger and singer Keri Hilson in your video, then cover up their faces? We’d understand if you could only afford some butterface girls to dance in your video, but come on! Is there some kind of ski mask fetish we don’t know about? Probably… We'll let it slide. Why? Because why watch the video anyway? Timbaland's music's got a unique, addictive rhythm all his own. The video's nice, but the music's what makes us get up in the morning and actually jog. Or dance. Or hook up in clubs on the weekends. The dude himself has pretty much hooked up with every hot musical talent in the world, producing hot singles--or entire albums--for all of them, including Nelly Furtado, Missy Elliot, One Republic, and Justin Timberlake. And once you reach the top, you can do whatever you want. Including covering up two of the most gorgeous women alive with ski masks...for whatever kinky reason you have. Pamela Anderson is “No Longer Pregnant”So instead of having a baby (bad idea), Pamela Anderson is focusing her energy on creating her own lingerie line (good idea). Hey, when you have that much sex with that many different people, you might as well capitalize on your knowledge. Pam’s convinced her ideas for panties, garters and bras will make the women who wear them have an edge in the bedroom. Says the former Baywatch babe, “I am going to sit back and create a line of lingerie and body products, products that are really sexy and things that I love to wear and my friends love to wear.” We’ll bet she has kinky friends, too. This should be exciting! Maybe she’ll get her own Target line… David Beckham—The World’s Most Perfect Shirtless HumanitarianBeckham got so much exposure for his secret visit to Sierra Leone that the trip was well worth it. Some facts we’ve learned as a result of David Beckham’s UNICEF trip: 1 in 4 children in Sierra Leone die before they turn 5 years old. And Sierra Leone also has the highest rate of maternal mortality—an estimated 1,300 per 100,000 live births! Way to go David Beckham for shedding light onto this issue! What else is David Beckham known for? Well, for starters, he’s married to Victoria—“Posh Spice” of the “Spice Girls”. As a result, he has been thrust into a world of high fashion and has been said to be kind of a metrosexual—he likes getting dressed just as much as his fashionista wife. Now playing for the LA Galaxy soccer team, David is reported to have signed a deal with the team for more than $250 million in salary and commercial endorsements. That’s about $1 million per week for a 5-year deal. No wonder he and Posh look so good all of the time! They can buy “hot”. But we know David was born that way. So unfair. Adam Levine—Hooked on Karaoke!Adam Levine has gotten his sex-symbol status for several reasons, the most obvious being he’s the lead singer in a really good rock band, Maroon 5. Born in 1979 in Los Angeles, the 28-year old singer gained a Playboy image when Maroon 5’s first album rolled out. It had songs all about his various lady friends, as does the band’s second album, It Won’t be Soon Before Long. He even admitted in an interview that he’s “slightly” an exhibitionist—especially “in the right situation”. Woah. And with lyrics that come straight from his mattress, it’s no wonder we’ve fallen for this bad boy. Adam Levine, you can feel free to use us then write a sexy song about us any time! Daniel Craig--Bond is Back! Daniel Craig is the 6th actor to be portraying James Bond, and has even gotten some Bond-lovers to admit they like him more than Sean Connery, the quintessential and original Bond. With a magnificently sexy sculpted body, the Daniel Craig enticed women to buy into the Bond franchise a little more—Craig’s Bond was a true lover, not just a playboy. He was married for 2 years to Scottish actress, Fiona London, with whom he has a daughter Ella. Rumor has it he’s been dating Japanese-American film producer Satsuki Mitchell for the past few years, but you can always try to weasel your way into his heart! David Hasslehoff- Give Me My Golf Cart Back!David Hasslehoff apparently can’t be hassled to buy a new golf cart and took his ex to court over getting his golf cart back from her. Now that he’s succeeded in getting his motorcycle, there’s no telling what might happen to the golf cart. The way we see it, if these two are going to fight so much about a golf cart, neither of them are fit to own it and it should be given up for adoption. Victoria’s Secret “What is Sexy” ListVictoria’s Secret “What is Sexy” list isn’t exactly the Bible of sexiness (everyone has their own taste), but it certainly gives us sexy celebrities to talk about! On this year’s list: Ryan Seacrest for his smile, Victoria Beckham for sexiest mom, Scarlett Johansson for her sexy style, Jessica Biel for her lips, and Ali Larter for her legs. Also on the list, Rihanna for sexiest female musician, Katherine Heigl and her husband Josh Kelley for sexiest newlyweds, and Eric Bana for sexiest actor. We think the Victoria’s Secret people did a fine job of compiling the list, don’t you? Most Desirable Women of 2008Katherine Heigl is the AskMen.com’s Most Desirable Woman of 2008. The “Grey’s Anatomy” sweetie had a break-out performance in “Knocked Up” and recently married singer Josh Kelley. She’s not only super hot, she’s smart, funny, and talented; she won an Emmy for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series last year. And she was named one of Barbara Walters’ “10 Most Fascinating People of 2007”. As if that weren’t enough, she stars in this year’s “27 Dresses” as Jane, proving that it’s not just men that love Katherine Heigl. Every woman wants to be her best friend, too! Eva Mendes is Calvin Klein’s 2008 ObsessionEva Mendes might just loose her biggest endorsement deal yet, for Calvin Klein’s sexy scent, “Obsession”. Why? Because Eva is obsessed with…drugs! You guessed it! Nobody in Hollywood is sober, we swear! Eva Mendes checked into rehab at the Cirque Lodge in Utah a few weeks ago. Yes, that’s the same place Lindsay Lohan spent a big chunk of 2007. Eva’s publicist said the sexy 33-year old star of films like “Hitch” and “2 Fast 2 Furious” felt her issues “deserved some outside professional support”. Please get over whatever is troubling you, Eva. You’re hot, and we don’t want you to OD! Mariah Carey Won’t Be UglyCharlize Theron is one of many stars who uglified themselves to win an Oscar. It’s like a right of passage for hot actors to play an ugly person, thereby proving what great actors they are. Hot superstar Mariah Carey couldn’t care less. She refused to become unattractive for her role in the movie “Tennessee”, in which she plays a waitress who goes on a trip with 2 brothers to find their father. Sources from the set say she wasn’t a diva about her demands, but that she just seemed very insecure about her appearance. You know, Mariah, confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can wear! Scarlett Johansson and Penelope Cruz in Lesbian Sex SceneWoody Allen is truly a thinly masked soft-core porn director. His latest film, “Vicky Christina Barcelona” has everyone abuzz talking about the hot and steamy Sapphic sex scene between Scarlett Johansson (23) and Penelope Cruz (33). Nobody even cares what the movie is about. That scene alone will have every man and woman on the planet with access to a movie theatre hitting up Fandango for seats the second the film hits theatres. Scarlett has been named Playboy’s “Sexiest Celebrity” and FHM’s “Sexiest Woman Alive” in 2006. This is one porn film your girlfriend won’t mind watching with you. Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson Engaged?Scarlett Johansson is one girl every man would like to call his own. Perhaps that’s why rumors are floating that the 23-year old sexpot is engaged to 31-year old Canadian hottie, Ryan Reynolds, since they’ve been sort of dating for about a year. That, and Scarlett has been spotted shopping with her mother for wedding dresses at the Monique Lhuillier boutique in Los Angeles. Ryan has been romantically linked to Alanis Morisette, whom he dated for almost 6 years, and to whom he was engaged from 2004 to February 2007. Is it too soon for Ryan to be engaged again? We think so. Just because we like the idea that we could be next in line, if Scarlett Johansson isn’t! Hollywood’s Hottest On-Screen CouplesWhile Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are arguably the hottest on-screen couple in recent history, Hollywood determines who’s hot by who brings in the most cash. Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst raked in $2.5 billion with the “Spiderman” franchise. Coming in second is Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio for “Titanic”, which grossed $1.8 billion worldwide—more than any other movie in history! Then come some unconventional partnerships, that is dude + dude action. Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones proved themselves a box-office sensation with “Men in Black” while Danny Glover and Mel Gibson did likewise with the “Leathal Weapon” series. And then there’s Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker with their “Rush Hour” series.So there you go. You don’t have to have big boobs, luscious lips, and bulging biceps to be Hollywood’s hottest couple. But those of us who live for sexy celebrities prefer you do! Naked Cowboy Suing M&MsThe Naked Cowboy, the crazy buff dude who stands in New York City’s Times Square and serenades passers by, thinks an M&M is infringing on his trademark look: tightie whities and cowboy boots. Claiming that Mars, Inc., the manufacturers of M&Ms, offered him $50,000 to shut him up, the Naked Cowboy is now suing the company for about $6 million. So is he just a crazy man who runs around in his underwear and dreams of the day he’ll be as famous as the green M&M, or is there some truth to his claim? The Naked Cowboy M&M ad, which was playing on a large screen just above the M&M store, was no longer up as of yesterday. Pamela Anderson Strips for V-Day in ParisPamela Anderson is known for her oversized boobs, and tight body. People didn’t even think twice when they saw the buxom blonde riding around on the back of a motorcycle wearing nothing but a sheer black body stocking in Paris. Or maybe they did. In fact, they probably paid a pretty penny to get a glimpse of the former “Baywatch” star. Lindsay Lohan’s Nude Photo ShootLindsay Lohan poses nude in a new spread for New York Magazine. Ok, so not like Playboy nude, but she bares her breasts—and her mom, Dina, seems to be fine about it, since it was a recreation of a famous shoot Marilyn Monroe took some 46 years earlier, shot by the same photographer, Bert Stern. Says Dina, “It was very tastefully done. I respect the photographer as an artist, so I look at them artistically. For him to call Lindsay 46 years later and to say can you recreate these photos is an honor. I don't look at them like it's Playboy; she was being a character. If you look at it that way, you can look at it as a mother." Right-o. Sexy Eva Longoria's Ladies Night OutBreaking away from her bodyguards for a few moments, Posh opted to wait in line at the ladies room instead of heading to a private bathroom. Sexy Clooney Rumor Control - Not Returning to ERHe explains, "No, we never even talked about it. No one has ever asked me. It's the funniest thing. The story came out, and I was like, 'Where did that come from?' It was everywhere - I mean in one day! I ran into John Wells two days ago on the lot … and said to him, 'What the hell happened?' He said, 'I don't know. I don't know where that came from." But Clooney isn't discounting how crucial the role was to his catapulting him to stardom, adding, "I was 33 when ER hit, so I have a very different outlook on the way things work. I don't think I was supposed to have been famous. I realize how much of this is luck." Sexy Justin Timberlake to Host ESPY Awards"I'll do my best to deliver a great show, as I do not want to be roughed up backstage by these athletes who are bigger, faster and stronger than me," Timberlake said. Sexy Mariah Carey - #1 Most Singles on BillboardNow all Mariah Carey has to do is make two more hits to surpass the Beatles, who are the all-time leaders with 20 No. 1 singles. Sexy Paris Hilton’s Parents Love Benji MaddenKathy Hilton went on to add “Benji is great. They are both very lucky and it’s a perfect matchup. Since they’ve been together Paris has changed so much. She’s calmed, stopped running and now has a very real purpose—and its beautiful to see two wonderful people so perfect together. Was the D.C. Madam Murdered?Deborah Jeane Palfrey made more than $2 million from her Washington, D.C., call girl ring - but days before she was found hanged, she was so broke she couldn't afford to pay a $5 bill. Based on Palfrey's sudden poverty and gnawing fears, police concluded the 52-year-old former madam hanged herself. Sex and the City - The MovieAs for the movie itself? Reviews so far are fairly united in proclaiming "Sex and the City" too long and slow. But some say it’s sweet and appealing. And even harsher critics admit that fans of the TV show will likely love the movie. |
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